FA Carling Premiership Game 7: Saturday 20 September 1997 Leeds United 0 - 1 Leicester City (Half-time: 0 - 1) Crowd: 29620 Referee: K W Burge (Tonypandy)
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View from the Kop - Martyn Brown

After a promising opening and stacks of possesion, we just didn't have what it takes to get past a solid and well drilled Leicester defence. They scored from a set-piece and we could have/should have had at least a share or all 3 points. The last 20minutes were nothing but frustrating and it just wasn't to be.

Martyn - 6, not that much to do, didn't see their goal, 1 good save - a shadow of himself last season
Kelly - 7, one of our better players who showed some idea and spirit.
Robertson - 5, Started off well but faded to anonymity in the 2nd half.
Haaland - 6, Tried but most unimaginative.
Halle - 7, for my money, one of his better performances, looked ok up front, occasional bad distribution.
Wetherall - 8, good performance (esp as a 2nd half right midfielder!) despite a couple of cock ups
Radebe - 6, Quiet by his standards before going off, hope it's not going to be long.
Bowyer - 4, Headless chicken, bad passing, wreckless challenges, silly booking. Nice 323i convertible though.
Ribeiro - 6, Didn't quite pull it off despite trying very hard. One of the glimpes of imagination.
Wallace - 7, Great 1st half, looked lively and always dangerous. Marked out of it in 2nd half.
Hasselbaink - 4, Poor. Subbed at half time. I'd be suprised if he's still here in January.

Subs:

Molenaar (for Radebe) 4, Wrong person at the wrong time. We needed something to spark us, he didn't help.
Kewell (for Hasselbaink) 7, Lively and worked hard, just a bit too easy to brush off the ball.
Lilley (for Wallace, incredibly) 5, about as impressive as it'll get. Reminds me of all the 1980's kack we had up front.

Ref: Burge (TonyPandy) 5, mostly wank. Deserved his "You don't know what you're doing" chant.

I thought there were some amusing things such as "Are you wilko in disguise?" when subbing Wallace to bring on Lilley. The fight/penalties between Filbert & Ellie and "You don't know what you're doing" aimed at GG.

Also, ordered a beef pie and a cornish pastie at half time. Got chicken/mushroom pie [cold] and cheese pastie [stank]. At least the coca-cola was reminicscent of what I ordered.

Ah well, bring on the scum. I`ll be in the Adelphi next week, time to initiate my 14yr old cousin!!

It's An All Time Low at Fortress Elland Road - Voice of Football

I arrived in time for a Marti Pellow lookalike singing "love is all around" or whatever, some pathetic girls doing a cheerleader type performance in the centre-circle (I thought this sort of thing failed in the mid-80s) and a half empty stadium. Great - makes you long for the footy to start.

The music has changed - Reef has been ditched. It's now a tape of some screetching noises, played backwards. I'm told it's Chumbawamba, but it's the biggest pile of garbage I've ever heard and totally unsuitable. What the fuck is going on? Bring back Rocky (yep, it's that bad).

The game started and after about 5 mins it was apparent that:-
a) we couldn't be arsed
b) we are shite
c) we'd probably lose

The most dire performance since Billy Bremner got his marching orders then unfolded. It was truly awful with not one redeeming feature. Will someone please shoot lazy arse JF Hassellbaink before the much anticipated row with GG happens. I don't think I can face another tubby/yebbo style showdown!

Half-time 1-0 down to a free header from a corner. Not sure what happened. Was Martyn glued to his line? Didn't bother watching MOTD to find out.

Then another blast from the 1980s. A fucking half-time penalty shoot-out. Embarrassing in the extreme, because the team of youngsters representing Leicester had an average age of 6 and our's was about 13!!! Just pathetic. Piss up in a brewery is beyond our club at the moment. Oh yeah, if you were lucky enough to have a magic star stuck to the bottom of your seat, then "you too can take part in a penalty shoot-out next week"!

Second half. Total turgid boredom. Hassellbaink off, Kewell on. It must be indicative of the mess we're in when our hopes rested on this young pup's shoulders. Hoofs to Wallace, interspersed with some nicey-nicey passing going nowhere became our game plan. Leicester fans just pissed themselves and sang "what's it like to follow shit". Ours sang "you don't know what you're doing" when incredibly Super Rod was replaced by Lilley, and "are you Wilko in disguise" - sadly not, because we'd be 3-0 up.

Final whistle and we'd had a total of 2 shots on target. Boos rang out and calls for GG's head!

On the way home, the conversation turned to Carlton Palmer. Whatever your views on the Colossus, I'd challenge anyone to give a reason why he isn't in the team ahead of this crock of crap! I actually tried to phone 606 - the first time ever I've been moved to such extreme action - to publicly DEMAND his recall. To no avail.

Scores

Martyn - 6
Halle - 4
Robertson - 4 (best game for the club though)
Radebe - 6 (badly injured - replaced by Molenaar (lucky not to be sent off)- 4)
Weatherall - 5
Kelly - 5
Bowyer - 2
Haaland - 3
Ribeiro - 6 (for trying harder than anyone else)
Wallace - 5 (no service whatsoever)
JFH - 1 (Kewell - 6)

GG - 1

vs Leicester - Nick Allen

Leeds Utd having in recent history broken record for managing to avoid relegation while failing to win a single match away from home all season, and then avoiding relegation while scoring the lowest number of goals ever for a team to survive, have now set their sights on a new record ; surviving whilst failing to win a home game all season. So far 4 down and only one point to show for it, and with their next 2 home games are against Scum and Newscum so no danger to GG's masterplan there then.

We were atrocious, clueless, unintelligent, ball-less, never looked like scoring. Let's face it Leicester didn't break into a sweat on Saturday. This slating includes the manager. What is the reasoning behind being 0-1 down at home to Leicester,and ;

1. taking off your main striker at half time ;
2. replacing him with a 19-yr old left sided midfield player ;
3. taking off your leading goalscorer after 75 mins. ;
4. replacing him with a scottish donkey.

POINTS

MARTYN -5- In my eyes to blame for the goal, came, stopped, was standed.
KELLY -5- reasonably comfortable as sweeper, but the team can't afford him there...cos...
HALLE -3- ...is a shit full back. Where Kelly would come steaming up the wing to support Rod on the right, Halle was never closer than 20 yds off him.
WETHERALL -5- decent defnsive game. But you do know that something is going pear-shaped with your team when Big Dave is your main right winger... - no its not total football -
RADEBE -7- only Leeds player worth his place. Worried by his injury... as was GG, who shot off the bench as soon as Lucas went down.
ROBERTSON -3- back to the old shite
BOWYER -4- completely anonymous
HAALAND -4- as Bowyer...
RIBERIO -6- Tried but faded, due to complete dross around him, but got involved tackled back... doing Robertson's job for him.
WALLACE -6- tried without support.
HASSELBAINK -4- again anonymous, but as with Rod the service they recieved was appaling. Leicester have the biggest back 4 I've seen and we kept playing the ball in the air to our forwards... tactics - does this word mean anything to GG. He's in this morning's papers saying that Jimmy isn't up to the English league as yet - MORE MONEY WELL SPENT !
MOLENAAR -3- lumbering shit
KEWELL -5- tried hard out of position, dropped deeper and deeper to get the ball.
LILLEY - Or running up the white flag as its known

Graham misses point and points - Michael Walker

Six weeks on, seven games in and the contenders are beginning to jostle to the front of the pack. Yes, the "Worst Premiership Game Of The Season" competition is starting to simmer. On Saturday alone we were given a few fresh candidates, the howler at Hillsborough sounding like a real head-tightener, but like a bullet into the No 1 spot goes this game at Elland Road.

Connoisseurs of "it's-so-bad-it's-good" football will no doubt point out that, as we saw a goal at Elland Road, things cannot have been that bad. They will also argue, and correctly, that the 90 minutes did not descend into farce and therefore can hardly compare with last season's winner - Sunderland v West Ham at Roker Park.

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